Tuesday, March 9, 2010

On snipers and dogs and courage awards

I was watching LA Task Force on Animal Planet. It is a reality show (possibly a special, or a pilot) following the animal cruelty task force of the LAPD/LA Animal Services.

The episode included the following story: Two Samoyeds (one looked like a possible Eskie mix) got loose from their home. They have a history of getting loose. During their escapades, one is shot and the other never returns home. The mystery is solved when it is discovered that a neighbor had shot at the dogs as they fled from him. The dog who was shot returned home. The other dog? The neighbor called him over and lured him into the house. The dog was shot in the head but not killed. After returning from dinner, the neighbor discovered the dog alive and proceeded to stab the dog with a samurai sword. He then dumped the body in a landfill.

Everyone was stoked to break the case and arrest the neighbor (who was arrested on other unrelated charges). The man had hundreds of assault rifles, guns, ammunition and enough knives and swords to arm a small militia.

One officer had this to say, and I paraphrase: If he could do this to dogs, just think about what he could do to people. I'm glad he's off the streets.

I don't need to think what he would do to people - he was doing it on behalf of our military. The neighbor was a former marine sniper. He killed people for a living. Whether he killed animals before joining the marines is certainly up in the air, but there isn't any question that this man was quite comfortable killing other humans (he even makes a point of saying there would have been a lot of dead cops had he had access to his guns before his arrest), let alone a couple of, in his words, annoying dogs. My guess, of course, is that most former marine snipers do not go onto to kill dogs, annoying or otherwise, with samurai swords or stockpile a small nation's worth of armaments.

Also, today, Michael Vick - dog executioner extraordinaire - is receiving a courage award. Nothing says "I care about helping abused children" like "I used to choke dogs with my bare hands."  That, dear readers, takes a lot of courage. Perhaps Vick threatened his team-mates with a poolside electrocution if they didn't vote for him. That is the only acceptable answer for why they voted him a very courageous person. Amirite?

1 comment:

Pibble said...

Boy, arurite. Vick aside, that is one crazy guy in LA.

I still can't believe the Ed Block folks haven't said boo about giving the award to Vick. I hate the word "chumps," but this seems like an opportune time to use it.